Blog Archives

Friday July 10, 2020

Mary Jones was debating on the best means of dropping her current boyfriend. Her friend ask: “Are you worried because you think he’ll tell lies about you?” Mary answered: “I don’t mind the lies, but if he ever tells the

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Thursday July 9, 2020

Mom: What did you do at school today? Mark: We played a guessing game. Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam? Mark: That’s right.

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Wednesday July 8, 2020

 Why did the rooster go to kfc?  Answer: to see the chicken strip

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Tuesday July 7, 2020

Patient: Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I’m a dog. Doctor: Lie down on the couch and I’ll examine you. Patient: I can’t, I’m not allowed on the furniture.

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Monday July 6, 2020

Wife: “What are you doing?” Husband: “Nothing.” Wife: “Nothing? You’ve been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.” Husband: “I was looking for the expiration date.”

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Friday July 3, 2020

Has anyone else’s gardening skills improved during this quarantine like mine have? I planted myself on the sofa at the start of April and I’ve grown bigger ever since.

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Thursday July 2, 2020

A bank robber pulls out gun points it at the teller, and says, “Give me all the money or you’re geography!” The puzzled teller replies, “Did you mean to say ‘or you’re history?’” The robber says, “Don’t change the subject!”

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Wednesday July 1, 2020

Math Teacher: “If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?” Student: “A drinking problem.”

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Tuesday June 30, 2020

Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick? A: “Put it on my bill.”

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Monday June 29, 2020

Husband: You will never succeed, in making that dog obey you. Wife: Nonsense! it’s only a matter of patience, remember I had a lot of trouble with you at first as well…

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Friday June 26, 2020

A father was teaching his 6-year-old daughter how to unbuckle her seat belt. The daughter asked, “Do I click the square?” The father said, “Yes.” The daughter then wanted to know, “Single click or double click?”

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Thursday June 25, 2020

Husband: Babe, after work I had an accident. Sabrina took me to the hospital. After various tests, they said I was in a bad state with cervical dislocation, multiple facial injuries. Also, they will have to amputate my right leg.

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Wednesday June 24, 2020

My friend reviewed her young son’s fill-in-the-blank homework. One line: “At Christmas, we exchange gifts with ___________.” His response: “Receipts.”

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Tuesday June 23, 2020

A man say’s to the mailman: This empty envelope must be from my sister Charlotte. Mailman: Now why would she send you an empty envelope? Man: We had an argument, and she’s not talking to me..

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Monday June 22, 2020

Bob took two stuffed dogs to the Antiques Roadshow. “Ooh,” said the presenter.“ This is a very rare set produced by the celebrated Johns Brothers taxidermists, who operated in London at the turn of the last century.  Do you have

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