Blog Archives

October 4, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little

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October 3, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A guy sits down at the bar and orders drink after drink. “Is everything okay, pal?” the bartender asks. “My wife and I got into a fight and she said she isn’t talking to me for a month!” Trying to

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September 29, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

She was outside pulling weeds on a hot summer day when her husband walked up and asked her what they were having for dinner. Irritated by the thought of him sitting in the air conditioned house while she laboured away

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October 28, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

There once was a very slow moving snail who wished he could be fast like all the other animals. One day he met a magic Genie who promised to grant him his wish. The snail asked the Genie for a

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September 27, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Its Mike’s first day on the job as a bartender. As he serves a customer a Manhattan, a piece of parsley falls into the drink. “What the hell is that?” the customer asks. “It’s your Manhattan. And there’s Central Park.”

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September 26, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

An artist goes to the art gallery where his paintings are sold. The manager told him: I have a good news and a bad news.  An investor dropped by last week for a global evaluation of your paintings.  He asked

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September 25, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Wife says: “What are you doing?” Husband: Nothing. Wife: “Nothing…? You’ve been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.” Husband: “I was looking for the expiration date.” Photo courtesy of clipartpanda.com

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September 14, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

An elementary teacher was illustrating the circulatory system and asked her class “Why is it that when I stand on my head my face turns red from the blood rushing to my head, yet when I stand up that doesn’t

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September 7, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Sweet heart … I have a great wonderful news for you…. Very soon, we will be three… The husband replied: Oh thank you. I am so happy…. The wife replied: Sweet heart… I am so glad you take it so

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September 6, 2017 -Jewel Joke Of The Day

I’ve always been confused between the definition of right and wrong. When I was a kid my parents would say, “Boy, you have done wrong.” I’d say, “Is that right?” They would say, “Yes.” Photo courtesy of clipartpanda.com

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September 5, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

“What did the buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school?” “Bi Son” Photo courtesy of clipartpanda.com

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August 31, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Police Warning, There is a wig blowing about at the corner of Yonge and Bloor, Police warn ,do not approach it, as it’s off it’s head. Photo courtesy of clipartpanda.com

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August 30, 2017 -Jewel Joke Of The Day

A Texas cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the pearly gates. “Have you ever done anything of particular merit?” St. Peter asked. “Well, I can think of one thing,” the cowboy offered. “On a trip to the Black Hills in

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August 29, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

The room was full of pregnant women with their husbands. The instructor said, “Ladies, remember that exercise is good for you. Walking is  especially beneficial – strengthens the pelvic muscles and will make delivery that much easier.  Just pace yourself,

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August 28, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Farmer Jack once lived on a quiet rural highway but as time went by, the traffic slowly built up and eventually got so heavy and so fast that his free range chickens were being run over, at a rate of 

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